It's amazing how unclouded your mind can become within one day. I'm glad I stayed there and talk to her even though I was really reluctant to. I wanted to stay longer and talk to her more but I was afraid you would be upset when you saw me at your house.

But... talking to her makes me realize how selfish I am. She's know much more about you then I ever will. Talking to her felt like I was talking to you.

I couldn't stop crying even when I laughed. After all, that's how I have been all my life. Crying, crying crying. To change that part, would be hard. To use it as an excuse or threat, is just being in denial. It's time to get rid of that habit that has been with me for 18 years, eh?


I'm gonna comfort myself by saying that actually realizing that I have to grow up is the first step. However, despite all this, a part of mind is still messed up. What my future will be like, what path will I take?

I guess as my mind matures, I will figure it out. However, I think I have a pretty good idea.

Growing up, is not saying goodbye to your old self, it's just a change everyone has to go through, while still holding on to a bit of the past.