I have no clear direction in life, I'm lost. I don't know which path to take or what to do in the future and taking one step at a time doesn't seem to be a solution.

I'm no longer able to think of a place where I actually belong, where I'm actually needed or a person who needs me. I feel so dispensable. 

I really need to get my thoughts straight, but I can't seem to do so.

I really want to just... stop time right now. I need a bit of it.... just to collate my thoughts and what I really want in life, what I want to do. 

Decisions I have to make? Do I want to quit League of Legends, do I want to leave Girlaxy? What am I going to do after I graduate from Polytechnic? Is it worth trying anymore? 

Those are my main concerns, but there's so much more troubling me. 

Sigh... I thought people were supposed to enjoyed their upcoming 18th birthday...